Ritual

It seems that ritual is important to good performance. This experience (Romeo and Juliet) has reminded me of that.
It has been many years since I last performed, but the feelings have all returned as if it was yesterday.
I remember being at the gate, waiting to go on. Watching the Devils (or whoever was before us) and preparing to go on the field. We didn't have a literal character to play (like I have for R&J). For us it was more about being "bad ass", or "in the zone", "on fire".
There were lots of grunts and groans and loud "YEAH! Let's do this!". Jumping up and down...you name it and someone was doing it to get ready to perform.
Everyone had their own thing.I needed to have a little space from the group. Not too far, I fed off of their energy. But far enough that I could do my own thing.
I was pretty mellow. I paced a lot, shaking out arms and legs while thinking through random parts of the show. I remember in '89 whenever we saw Phantom, we got to the gate during the "ballad". It had a nice "beat" (jazzy actually) so I would find myself "groovin' to da sounds of da Phantom Regiment". Every time. Even at finals. But mostly, I kept to myself. Getting in to the show.
It seems now that I still prepare the same way. During my time in Romeo and Juliet I would wander off and pace as I went over my lines.
Still shaking out arms and legs, sometimes swinging a sword or waving a gun to help me find my character.
It felt a lot like all those years in the Vanguard. The same kind of intensity and focus. And once I got on stage, it all came out. It feels good to let it happen. To get rid of all of the rest of life's issues through my prep and performance.

It felt good to be in that place (again).

Everyone has their way. We just have to find it.